seriously though, how much of a DICK is shane?

i haven't been doing HUGE amounts of late. this summer (can we call it that yet?) finds me listless, and trying to claw my way back to being comfortably in the black again. hmmmm.

anyway! this means i have been doing other things, such as READING and, er, watching the telly.

freezer burn - joe r lansdale. a random choice plucked from declan's stash. a nice, easy, trashy read. total loser (mum dead and mouldering in bed, failed firework stand heist) ends up working for a freak show, boffing the boss's wife, and failing even further at attempted murder. i'm not sure what the overall thing was trying to say, maybe 'don't trust a woman you're sleeping with she's only up to no good', but it was fun to read. and i have a wonderful mental image of conrad the dog-man that may not go away very fast.

the red queen - margaret drabble. took this on my little holiday by the sea. was a xmas pressie AGES ago from dan's mum, i think, bought solely because of the title. a book of two halves, the first tells the story (researched and mostly accurate but fictionalised) of the red queen in the title. a crown princess in korea some centuries ago. court intrigue, pre-teen marriage, insanity, and rampaging murder. the second half is the story of the modern woman who 'discovers' the tale of the red queen, becomes obsessed by it, and propogates it. including, at the end, to, oh yes, margaret drabble. hmmm. apart from that, i loved it. absorbing. i may have to do some research into old skool korea.

***

i have also seen:

coraline. hmmm. passed the time. probably more exciting with 3d glasses than on the telly.

quite a bit of 30 rock which is also so-so, why do people love tina fey so?

and breaking bad, which i only jumped into for the second series and regret not watching more. (chem teacher gets cancer, turns into meth king pin to provide for his family. what?)

***

my decision today: to BLOW my 5 months of good work in not buying things and invest in some completely unnecessary shoes or not. well?

(actually i need to ruin my record anyway, for i must purchase some sunglasses and oh look i own no shorts.....)

weds
to the alwyne for bluekieran's birthday drinks. head over straight from work, intending on a couple then home for dinner. am still there after teh birthday boy has left. whoops.

thurs
( spoilers! spoilers! krypton factor! spoilers! )

today
i am already looking forward to some tasty sushi later. can it be the weekend now, please?

so, a little late to the party here (god DAMN you archive email files!) but well done president obama. well done america. i clearly don't live in the usa, or have a proper idea of how he's going to change day to day life for all those that voted for him, but he seems to know what he's doing.

what i was most impressed with was the hugely high voter turnout. it seems, overnight, america got off it's arse and actually *cared*. and this i applaud.

***

of course, i didn't watch any of the coverage. i was watching more important voting. and catching up on old episodes of x-factor.

oh yeah, and actually, i like that macca iTunes advert. sorry. i don't find him smug, i see him trying to be cool and failing miserably, like an embarrassing dad. i find this ridiculously endearing.

shock horror :)

(still think it was a rotten choice of single though, but meh...)

The best thing this weekend was getting an email asking if I wanted to go to a Dick Party. Of course, the only possible answer to that question is HELL YEAH! BAYUUUUUP. Ah, joy!

***

It’s been an interesting weekend, in which I have spectacularly failed to do most of the things I planned to do. Things I did do, however:

Friday

Drinkies in the Foundry. Absinthe & lemonade is rather delicious!

Bedroom Bar! Dancing! Drinking! Lounging on beds with ace people! Leaving at a sensible(ish) hour! Ah, I always have an ace night there.

***

Saturday

Lovely drinkies in the Chandos for yiskah’s birthday.

Toasties! YEAH!

Falling over. BOO

Attempting to fall over repeatedly! I don’t understand. Perhaps my shoes were too small and my blood not alcoholic enough.

Home for Doctor Who (meh, although I can’t really comment due to repeated closing of eyes) and pizza and getting ready for slaughterhaus5

Schoolboy (girl?) Error!!! Lying down. Dozing. Did make it to the bus stop, bus didn’t appear. Went back home. Slept. On a Saturnight! Rubbish.

Sweet, sweet, sleep.

***

Sunday

The day of being stood up!

Yoga is cancelled, as I am almost ready for it. Gah!

Tea and cookies is postponed.

I don’t mind, and crack on with serious sewing. Only broke 2 of my machine needles! Well, you try sewing hugely gathered denim and see what happens! End result = basic skirt shape. Now to faff around with ‘windows’ and get some boning and make an underskirt out of the sheet I ruined in the washing machine. Recycle baybee, yeah!

Also manage to deconstruct bodice and start cutting pieces out of actual t-shirts. Wheeee! I can do this! Discover wedding decorations are perfect for lining too. More recycling! Yeah!

Bloomsbury Ballroom for CocoRosie. The venue is weird, but somehow beautiful. The mirrorballs make me sick. The weird kitchen / diner makes me happy. Bump into lanarak and friends.

Rio en Mendio or something similar is all girlish voice and quiet noise and pretty fey. Enjoy muchly.

Tez is a human beatbox. He’s good, but I’ve seen Beardyman….

CocoRosie are entrancing and mesmerising and weirdly vocalled. Tez comes into his own as their ‘percussion’ for the evening. I want to learn the harp. It’s dancy and ethereal and absolutely marvellous. Well done there.

Hipsters, however, appear to get dirtier, and more stupid-haired every day. Cuh.

***

Monday
Ah, I’m in a shockingly good mood today dear livejournal. (Well, I was....)

♥ Perhaps the recent woe was rooted in hormones. (I should check these things really but I’m far too lazy…)
♥ Perhaps I’m happy due to a decent nights sleep?
♥ Perhaps it has something to do with the fact I’m currently sleeping in this.
♥ Perhaps it’s due to my copy of yiskah’s book arriving, new read for the commute that doesn’t make me angry!
♥ Perhaps it’s due to some moocards arriving, though eh, they didn’t quite do what I told them to, and I have no idea what to use them for!
♥ Perhaps it’s due to Republic of Loose English tour dates I can actually get to! If you’re at a loose end 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th July, you should go see them. I think I can do the 3rd.
♥ Perhaps it’s due to my face popping up all over facebook, how entertaining. (Actually, normally this would make me cry…)

What’s keeping you cheery today, dear internet?

Rightio. Have done with my asbestos for the morning. Hopefully.

Nice quiet night again last night. Started with a mad dash (bumping into and dragging a martylog along for the ride) to HMV to see Rufus Wainwright do a short (but lovely) set in honour of Mojo or something. The editor of Mojo is a MILLION TIMES younger than I’d ever expected. He does have a beard though. Stereotyping – 50% accurate! Apparently sequinned teddy bear scarves are the Next Big Thing in fashion, you heard it here first!

I really regret not remembering to try and see Grinderman. The volume of Rufus was excessive. I can ~almost~ hear the wonderful NOISE of Grinderman that loud in my head, indeed, I ~have~ heard it at ATP, but it would have tickled me something special to hear it in a shop. Oh well.

Was also lovely to see an unexpected pataka, thanks to whom I am now the proud owner of a badge bearing the legend "shewho".* Which isn’t to suggest that I’m a legend, but, well, if you’d like to say so I wouldn’t mind. Oh dear.**

And then home, to clear up misunderstandings and watch another below par episode of Doctor Who***, though it wasn’t as bad as the previous double episode, eh. Mark Gatiss is still incredibly good at being overly creepy. The trailer for the next episode has drawn me in again, although I’m not sure I can cope with those horrible scarecrow looking creatures……

♥ ♥ ♥

There is a (dirty goffic) posse forming to go and see Prince at one of his O2 dates, seeing as it is only £31.12 or something, and you get a free copy of the album. AND it’s rumoured to be the last time he does the old greatest hits shebang. Do you want in? More importantly, are you on the O2 mobile network?

(I am unlikely to be able to join the posse for the dates announced so far, clash as they do with comedy in Edinburgh. Tarnation!)

♥ ♥ ♥

Oh yes, The Masque of the Red Death. A friend has 2 spare tickets for Friday 5th October, including disco after. This is coincidentally the day that I am going (with the lovely perfectlyvague, charleston, p_dan_tic and a couple of others WINOLJ. Fancy it? Let me know and I’ll pass on details. You don't even have to hang around with us, go off chasing actors, wheeee!

Think that’s all!






* Well, I ~would~ have had it some years ago had it not got lost in the diamond_geyser post. Isabelle – slower than carrier pigeon? ;)
** I am using the phrase ‘oh dear’ too much of late. This should possibly tell me something.
*** Last weeks innit.

Haha, it’s good to have an outlet for my nagging that isn’t dear p_dan_tic. Today I have (email) brownie points from my boss for my gentle (for me!) nag about tidying some drawings up. Validation! More! Validate me! Please?

Ahem.

***

Late notice I know, but I’m going to see Gilbert & George today. No two ways about it. The rest of my weekend is too hectic (thanks mum for the notice, grrrr). So, if you’re in the area about 1pm let me know, although I’m very happy bumbling around the Tate on my own anyway.

***

Why is everyone wearing a horrible plastic version of operating theatre clogs as sandals? They’re the ugliest things I’ve ever seen.

***

House was rather ace last night. Best start to an episode ever! Until the overly schmaltzy ending. Ho hum.

***

private_dick is back, hurrah! I need never be bored of the internets again. (I’m not even going to get a chance to read it all properly today, boo. Stupid blinking asbestos. Stupid blinking children. Grrr. I might turn myself off again today, don’t worry.)

***

Oh, and half price Yo! Sushi over the bank holiday weekend, hurrah! Go here for details and to sign up.

***

Last one, mupstasia, is there a pre Diamanda Galas meet up plan for Monday?

Dream News
The dreaming subconscious is brilliant, isn’t it? Last night, my brain realised I was sprawled across the bed in an unusual spread-eagled fashion, and that I’d wake up all stiff and sore. Instead of calmly moving / waking me, it sent me a dream in which I was an Asian male* and going parachuting. However, my ‘chute failed to open, and I sped towards the earth** and smashed into it, landing in a (you’ve guessed it) bizarrely spread-eagled fashion - exactly the same as I was actually lying in. People tried to move my legs, but they were stuck and painful. And thus I woke up, and curled into my typical foetal sleeping pose, before nodding off again.

Woke up again as D came home***, only to drift off into a dream about watching Drugstore live, with Thom Yorke playing guitar and not singing (??) to El Presidente. Dream only notable for Isabelle Drugstore looking not like herself but my friend TM’s mother, and a lot of crowd walk-outs, causing a Thom Yorke rant, and a sensible audience heckle.

~~~

Diary News
Last night, an early repast of strange tapas creatures (the cheese based things are best. Cheese, posh ham and quince jelly ftw!) and a chat with green_badger****. Home in time for ER, how reasonable! Anyway ER, bleak bleak bleak. Although if you overload ALL the main characters with the bleak***** like that it detracts from every single storyline you peons. Cuh.

PW2 News
On the way home I discovered that the prime time to play Phoenix Wright is whilst on a train or a Victoria Line tube to Walthamstow, after at least half a bottle of wine. I’m not sure if it’s because of these journeys being particularly conducive to gameplay, whether I’ve just coincidentally just got to a bunch of dialogue each time and am not really *doing* anything, whether wine increases my clever reasoning, or, most likely, whether being a teeny bit inebriated makes me as stupid as stupid Phoenix Wright. Edgeworth is still hot, despite my theory that makes him the super bad guy. Almost finished too.

~~~

Gig News
Feist is playing tonight. I wish I’d known about this earlier. Still, Herman Dune tomorrow!

~~~

Internet Sheep News
I’ve had a myspace for years (easily findable and obvious by the Dorothy Gale themed photo) and not really done anything with it apart from add random comedians from time to time. Is there really any point in me getting a facebook? What does it do?

Here is a quiz all about me, me, me. Have a go! See what you know!








* Extraneous detail I suppose, but it meant I looked like a grown up version of Neil something-or-other who was in my class at junior school. Not so extraneous now?
** More extraneous detail. A sandy beach. It looked Cornish…
*** Rather late and very drunk!
**** Dammnit B, you were obviously right. April Whitby started in 1997, Bowlie / ATP started in 1999, I think my first was 2000. Ah well, still *my* heart lies with post-rock first!
***** And one for luck – BLEAK!

Today, I need brain floss for: watching a walrus masturb@ting. Thanks WOW, no, really. (Only suckered in because they mentioned Paulie and Heather.)

***

Last night, a spot of Doom, followed by tasty eggs, disturbing House and last week’s Doctor Who, which was nowhere near as bad as I’d been led to believe, and indeed had several moments of laugh out loud genius. I *really* like the way Martha works with Tennant’s Doctor, she’s ace. And not just because I recognise a lot of myself in her, and I’m notoriously narcissistic. Oh no. Only less black.*

***

Tonight, I appear to be going to see Ian Svelonius (sp?) doing a reading, where I shall feel like a complete fraud, having never even *heard* the Make Up. As far as I know. This shall be followed by Heavy Trash, where I shall more’n likely feel filthy, and have lots of fun, and then B Movie, where I haven’t been for far too long, and shall likely feel rather inebriated. And overexcited. You have been warned!

[Which means I am missing the holy triumvirate of Ugly Betty, Derren Brown and Peep Show on t’telly. Boo!]

***

( Long, nonsense poll under cut! )

Poll #965712 Any more?
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 5

Any more for any more?

* My whole life! Argh!

Phoenix Wright is an idiot!

The most annoying thing about this game is how easy it *should* be. I’ve known how the murder I’m currently playing was committed since stupidly early into the stage, and (I think!) who masterminded it and why since before it happened.

But I can’t get through it! I know where the blinking clues actually are, but can’t get to them without talking to the right person who’ll then point me to where I know the clue is ALREADY DAMMNIT and miraculously I’ll now be able to see something I couldn’t see before EVEN THOUGH I LOOKED.

I find this *incredibly* frustrating, obviously. And I’m not sure if this makes me excellent at playing the game, because I know what and who and why and how, or completely rubbish, because I can’t get there. Am I superbly blessed with logic, or making great leaps of faith?*

The game is far too linear for my brain.

Either way, Phoenix is an IDIOT I tell you, an idiot.

***

Last night, post Doom, I sat in front of the glorious combination of House, ER and Boston Legal whilst playing the aforementioned game.

It is *wrong* to find aged, bloated James Spader (and to a certain extent William Shatner, blimey!) attractive, isn’t it? I suppose I actually mean Alan whatsit and Denny Crane, which is a different thing. Man, Boston Legal :)

***

This weekend looks like containing a healthy mix of dinner, karaoke, doctor who, indie clubbing, painting & decorating and children’s comedy. Thank goodness I don’t have to work, mwahahaha.

***

And because I’m facing a long Friday with no company (again!), here is an attention seeking poll.

Poll #956885
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: None, participants: 8

Shock me. Tell me something I don't know.

*I did this with House last night as well, the conclusion was OBVIOUS duh brain. Either I’m a fantastic diagnostician or I watch too much telly. I think I watch too much telly.


Oh man! It is SO TEMPTING to open spam sent by ‘Sith Lord’, but I am not quite an idiot. SO TEMPTING.

♥ Tuesday night I had an incredibly vivid dream where I was sewing up the incision left after a caesarean section. The other person sewing kept doing it wrong, the woman was awake, the incision went up to her breast bone and you could see all the layers of fascia and fat etc.

♥ last night at a recording of Never Mind the Buzzcocks I saw Paul Young's bottom.

♥ tonight I am going to eat scampi, and love it.

i usually get a little into Big Brother over the summer. Not hugely, unless it is very good, but watch at least a few bits and bobs a week.

i've hardly seen any this year. it appears to have become terribly tiresome. and full of cvnts. well, worse ones than normal.

i almost got caught up with the eating kit kats and getting a golden ticket idea, but i can't be naffed.

and who really needs Big Brother when other cr@ppy telly has been ace?!

my favourite thing in Hollyoaks is when it all falls down and people are caught out. and over the last week, MY how they have been caught out. IN YOUR FACE, Becca!

also, the penultimate episode of ER made me weep. for quite a while. and i never even liked the character!


******

also (again!) it is spring in ANIMAL CROSSING world, and there are LOADS of new species of fish for me to catch! Hurrah!